


Choices

by MaisieBee



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: ...and it involves James, Bisexual Sirius Black, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Gay Remus Lupin, Lily is useless at cleaning, Marauders, Marauders' Era, One Shot, Potterotica Podcast Exclusive, Sirius has cool tattoos, There is a plot-twist...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 15:35:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15003944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaisieBee/pseuds/MaisieBee
Summary: Lily Evans is bad-ass, lonely, and ready to kick her  on-again, off-again, not-ready-to-commit boyfriend, James Potter, in the balls. But having sex with his best friend is definitely her second choice.





	Choices

**Author's Note:**

> This short story was written in October 2017 for The Potterotica Podcast, a podcast where the hosts (Allie, Lyndsay, and Danny) read and discuss erotic Harry Potter fanfiction. On their website, the episode containing this story is listed as Quickie 5: Give A Dog A Boner. You can find it wherever you get your podcasts, and also here: https://potteroticapodcast.com/episodes/q5-give-dog-boner/ 
> 
> I love constructive critique on any of my stories. :)

Hogsmeade, July 31st, 1979

 

It was a shitty day to be Lily Evans. 

 

The stale, lemon-scented Muggle cleaner from the back of the cabinet was the only thing that could take the gunk off the tiles and it was burning the backs of her hands. Two stupid, drunk wizards had fought right before closing time, whipping out their wands and attempting to hex each other into the next life. The Hungarian Horntail, a wizarding bar that was so hardcore that Lily had gotten her eyebrow pierced just to feel like she fit in, had magical protections exactly for that sort of encounter, but it only worked to change the outcome of a spell. Instead of one that caused painful lacerations to the victim's arms and legs, gallons of green, floral-smelling jelly had spurted from the one wizard's wand. And, however hard she tried, it simply wouldn't get clean with any of the spells she knew. 

 

Lily sat back on her heels, annoyed. "Fuck this!" she cried, throwing the rag down. Why should she have to be at work until three in the morning because some wizards couldn't hold their liquor or their tongues? 

 

"I'm leaving the keys in the bowl, Lily. Lock up when it's clean, yeah?" the whining voice of the bar manager, Eddie, a half-goblin wizard, itched at her nerves tonight. "See ya tomorrow, love."

 

"Later, Eddie," she said with false cheer as the back door of the bar slammed shut behind the goblin. She picked the cloth back up and returned to scrubbing.

 

Her knees ached from the hard, black tiled floor. She kept sneezing from the overpowering combination of lilac and lemon. It was the worst night she'd had in a long while, and she'd had some pretty awful nights lately. Her mind drifted back to James and her stomach dropped out from under her with that familiar pain she'd had for the past week. Had it already been one week? How could he be so selfish? Tears filled her eyes but she hastily wiped them away. 

 

Fuck James. And not in the fun way. 

 

After another half hour of scrubbing, Lily bailed. She shut and locked the front door behind her, sliding the keys into the open mouth of the Horntail statue that guarded the entrance and acted as an enchanted bouncer. She yanked her hand back as the stone dragon snapped it's mouth shut. The stone fangs were sharp. 

 

Hogsmeade was quiet. The darkened streets with the quaintly rickety buildings all smashed together suddenly made her feel hemmed in, stuck in a cage. She needed to break out in a bad way. But hadn't that been what James had said? "It's a cage. I can't be in a cage.”

 

Who did he think he was, strutting around like he was king? All those quick retorts and witty nicknames didn't make him cool. It made him an asshole. An asshole who, in no uncertain terms, had said he didn't want a baby; not now, possibly not ever. No matter how much she begged and pleaded with him, he thought he was "too young" and she was "not mature enough" to handle the responsibilities of having a child. For heaven's sake! Her own mother had been a mother by her age! Twenty one wasn't that young. They were on their own and - had been, anyway - completely in love. There had been love enough for a child. It was the only thing she had ever asked of him in their five year relationship and he wouldn't even grant her that. 

 

Lily Apparated back to her apartment in the middle of Milton Keynes with a sharp, angry CRACK! The apartment was a little shabby, a little dreary, and still smelled bitter with singed wormwood. Lily had brewed a Drought of the Living Dead to take in small doses to help her sleep. Too much, of course, would have put her into a coma, but she hadn't been top of her year in Potions her whole time at Hogwarts for nothing.

 

As she took off her coat in the dark, she heard something move behind her. Her heart gave one painful thud before the light clicked on, momentarily blinding her. Her wand was instantly out, then a familiar, amused voice say:

 

"Woah, there, Evans. Sorry for breaking in, but you weren't answering the door. You know how I hate being ignored."

 

Her red-rimmed eyes quickly adjusted and she saw the gangly, dark-haired owner of the voice. He lounged on the battered green sofa, looking like he'd been through hell twice over judging by the bags under his eyes. Somehow, they still made him painfully good-looking. However, Sirius Black's grin faded when he saw her expression.

 

"Sirius!" she cried, more angrily than she intended, feeling her face flush. "What the hell?!"

 

One of his eyebrows twitched at her tone but he said nothing. 

 

A surge of anger made Lily roughly kick off her shoes, leaving another mark on the already dinged wall. "Look," she snapped. "If James sent you, you can tell him to go—"

 

Sirius held up a hand. "I'mma stop you there, Evans. I'm not here because James sent me," he finished, perhaps somewhat bitterly. 

 

"Good. Because my day has been shit and I'm ready to kick him in the nuts, but you'd more than do. Drink?" 

 

"Why not."

 

She stepped into the kitchen, skirting around the smoldering, encrusted caldron she still hadn't cleaned out, and stood on her tiptoes, trying to reach the glass bottle of Vivian's Veritas Vodka on the top of the fridge — it was a drink subtly infused with just enough Veristaserem to make Truth of Dare more fun. She couldn't quite reach it without a stool. Just as she was about to demand Sirius reach it for her, he was standing behind her. He reached over her head and grabbed the blue bottle. Lily turned sharply around and snatched at it, but he was faster than she was. Sirius dangled it out of her reach, a mischievous grin on his face. 

 

"Give it to me, Seers," she said, her tone unpleasant and bitchy even to her ears.

 

Sirius was alarmingly close to her. That infernal leather jacket of his smelled like the forest, crisp and cold. She could see the five-o'clock-shadow on his square chin and had that old urge to touch it. Back in school she'd had the maddest crush on Sirius. 'Come for the danger and stay for the sweetheart underneath' she used to say because she knew it got under James's skin. 

 

James. Goddammit, he needed to get our of her head. She was exhausted and emotionally beaten down. And Sirius looked really fucking hot right now.

 

"Come and get it, Evans," he said in a husky undertone, narrowing his dark eyes. Her skin prickled like it did during the casting of a powerful spell. 

 

Okay, now he looked really, really hot. His worn grey t-shirt, stretched out at the neck, was playfully revealing chiseled collar bones and olive-toned skin. She would have thought she was dreaming — she had always wondered if he was gay for their friend Remus; the prolonged eye-contact seemed to say so— had he not looked pointedly down at her parted lips and licked his own. 

 

Lily grabbed the collar of Sirius's jacket and dragged him down to her level with sheer force of will. She spat strands of red hair from her mouth and glared. "No." 

 

She started violently when he closed the gap between them with a kiss. Fire ignited in her belly. Somehow, it was a million times better than she'd ever imagined it, and she'd imagined it plenty. Once, even when she was kissing James. She'd felt bad about it then. She didn't feel bad about it now. 

 

The heat of his lips against hers made her dizzy with want of him. Her fingers clenched the leather until her knuckles were white. He pulled back and they broke the kiss, faces panting and red. Sirius reached out with his free hand and tenderly tucked Lily's hair behind an ear. But she was already dipping in again, open-mouthed and hungry. His hand slid from her cheek to the back of her neck and held her tightly as they kissed, wet and desperate for each other.

 

Lily relaxed her grip on his coat collar, and instead trailed her hands down his chest. Damn, he was actually quite fit under that shirt. Then he pushed back against the fridge, grabbing one of her hands and pinning it above her head. The vodka was forgotten on a counter. They didn't need it anymore. 

 

Her hand must have been cold, because Sirius made a noise when she slipped it under his shirt and pressed her palm flat against his stomach. He didn't protest when she broke their kiss and began yanking her own shirt over her head. 

 

The living room floor was surprisingly comfortable. Sirius hovered over her on all fours, half-naked and goose-pimpled. Lily dug her short fingernails with their chipped blue polish into his back as his mouth trailed over her shoulders, stubble lightly scratching her bare, freckled skin. The tattoos that covered his torso were a mix of Muggle and wizarding. The Muggle ones seemed older, the ink faded slightly from black to green-grey. The wizarding ones roamed over his stark ribs, designs swirling and distorting before her eyes. A koi fish, brightly colored and heavily saturated, swam around his back, darting over his pecs and out of sight down his trousers. He pushed her bra straps off her shoulders, decorating her skin with warm, tingly kisses while she watched the fish's travels. 

 

Then she was fumbling with the button and zipper on his jeans. He helped her, and she saw the fish once again dart around his ribs. The effect was hypnotic. Lily wanted a tattoo exactly like it. 

 

Then Sirius was kneeling between her spread legs in just his boxers. They were black, the fabric fitting snugly around his hips and the telling bulge in front. When she touched him, he twitched and let out a gasp that made Lily wonder how wet she was going to be when he finally got down there properly. Her fingers played teasingly around the elastic. She finally slipped one hand down his boxers and raked her fingers through his soft pubic hair. Her other hand drifted downward on the outside and noticed the hardness with a twinge of sudden uncertainty. 

 

Sirius stretched and grabbed his wand from the pile of clothes. Lily's eyes never left Sirius's lean, tattooed body for a second as he Accioed the box of Muggle condoms and bottle of Slippery Slytherin lube from her bedside table. He mistimed it slightly, and the packets of multicolored condoms spilled over the brown carpet. How he'd known they were there was a mystery to her. Perhaps James had told him. Her heart hammered in her chest. Was this really happening? Sirius grabbed one and ripped it open. 

 

This was happening. 

 

Lily somehow couldn't bring herself to look as Sirius put on a green condom — she thought that the brightly colored ones made sex so much less intimidating; plus, it was fun to see James cringe whenever he grabbed a pink one — so she just lay back and put her arms over her head, closing her eyes. 

 

"Ready?" Sirius breathed. His hand was hot on the inside of her thigh. 

 

Eyes shut. A nod. "Mhm."

 

"Okay."

 

He slipped off her panties with care. His head swam as he took in Lily Evan's naked body, from her round hips to her pointed chin, tilted upward, her bright, distinctive eyes shut tight. She heaved a shaky breath and Sirius shook himself out of his trance. 

 

Lily gasped as Sirius glided his cock into her. He was bigger than James, or so it felt like. Her walls clenched hard against him as he leaned over her and began thrusting in and out. She rocked back, the carpet rough against her skin, wrapping her arms around his neck for support as he worked. It wasn't as fast and hard as she'd fantasized while she got herself off with her Wonder Wand in the girls bathroom at Hogwarts, but he made her moan anyway. Everything seemed like a perfect fit, hot and beautifully smooth. Once Sirius had found his rhythm, he relaxed and began to suck at her neck. She hoped he would leave hickeys all over her neck, marking her. Lily wrapped her legs around his waist, pressing his head into her neck, moaning louder as he thrust into her, hitting her sweet spots again and again.

 

Lily knew he was going to cum moments before he did, his breath catching in his throat mid gasp. Her own pleasure bubbled over mere seconds before him. 

 

"Fuck, James!" Lily cried at the same time as Sirius groaned, "Prongs!"

 

As the spasms of the orgasm still rocked her body, Lily pulled back and stared at Sirius. He stared at her. Had he really just...?

 

His face was bright red, strands of his dark hair sticking to his forehead, highlighting his embarrassment. He stammered, "Evans, I swear, I have no idea— I mean, I definitely haven't— well, not recently..." He swallowed and looked away. "It was only a few handjobs in an empty classroom when we were seventeen."

 

Lily grimaced. "Shall we finish up and never speak of it again?" she said quietly.

 

"Yeah, let's," was his uncomfortable reply.

 

Sirius pulled out and Lily relaxed, rolling into her side and wrapping an arm around her bare breasts while he retreated to the bathroom. She stared unseeingly at weather-worn coffee table. Thoughts seemed to dart in and out of her mind like Sirius's koi fish tattoo, none of them sticking. Yes, banging Sirius had been nice, but suddenly she was overwhelmed with emptiness. Sweat stuck her thighs together, something she absolutely hated normally, but she just laid there, wondering what to do next.

 

When Sirius returned, washed up, he stood there awkwardly as if unsure of how to proceed. He pulled on his pants and jeans. It was strange to wander around someone else's apartment in the buff.

 

Finally, he was just standing there. "So, erm," Sirius said. 

 

Lily reached out and began to pick at the scratched legs of the coffee table, then she spoke: "I know I've probably given you the wrong impression, but I don't love you like that, Seers. I'm sorry."

 

He barked out a surprised laugh. "I knew that going into this, Evans. I'm not as oblivious as Pettigrew, please, give me some credit." She could see him out of the corner of her eye. He took a seat in the couch, a blur barely in her vision, pushing her discarded jeans off to one side. "You know I'm not head-over-arse for you, either. I'm kind of surprised you went with it. Why?"

 

Lily forced herself into a sitting position, brushing her hair back from her face distractedly. "You're hot, I'm mad at James, and fucking one of his best friends seemed logical. He said I wasn't mature enough to handle having a kid." Burning tears welled in her eyes. She pressed the heels of her hands over them, trying to force them back in as colors danced with the pressure. "I guess I just proved him right." 

 

The sound that exploded from Sirius made Lily peel one hand back. His face was twisted in an indignant expression. "James is an asshole!" he burst out. It seemed to be physically paining him to reign in his emotions. "He told me about your fight, tried to vent about it to me. When I wouldn't take his side, he got angry, and when I refused to lend him my motorbike so he could run away, he fucking stole it." Sirius laced his fingers together, twiddled his thumbs even, and sighed. "But if there's one thing I know about James, it's that no matter how badly he fucks up, he'll always be back. I hate to say it, but he really loves you, Lils."

 

"I know. It's so annoying, isn't it?" Something panged in Lily's chest, a sharp sensation that brought feeling suddenly flooding back in. "I don't want to take him back, Sirius, but I don't know if I can let him go," she cried, voice thick with tears. "I can't let him go."

 

"Then don't." Sirius stood and offered out a hand. He pulled her to her feet and kept her on them as he found a blanket to wrap around her shoulders. "But stand your ground, Lils, for heaven's sake. He needs to learn to give in and compromise sometimes. He'll change for you. He's done it before."

 

"You're right." Lily dried her face and gave a weak smile up at Sirius. "You're wonderful, Seers."

 

He grinned and squeezed her arm. "I know, Evans." 

 

Sirius stayed only for a few more minutes, helping her tidy up the mess they'd made and finally clean out that caldron. He was the most adept at cleaning spells of all of them. With both of them dressed and the apartment returned to order, Sirius shrugged on his coat and started for the door. 

 

"Seers," Lily suddenly said, surprising herself. 

 

He turned back. "Yeah?"

 

Tugging at her sleeves nervously, she asked, "One last kiss before we forget this whole thing ever happened?"

 

There was an audible pause, then a small, meltingly sweet smile crossed his lips. "Sure, Lil."

 

Lily closed her eyes as he came back over to her. His hand rested on her hip, soft and gentle. Then she felt his lips against hers and leaned into it. It was Lily who pulled away first. Her insides felt warm and calm and finally at peace. 

 

"Thanks."

 

He squeezed her arm. "You're welcome. And don't let James's words get to you — I know you'll be a great mother someday."

 

Sirius left, closing the front door extra carefully behind him. She hears his footsteps take him down the stairs. Then there was a CRACK as he Disapparated. 

 

It was four o'clock in the morning. Lily took a shower and then went to bed.

She didn't need the Draught to sleep tonight. 

— 

January 2nd, 1980

A barn owl flew over the motorbike parked on the pavement outside and in through the kitchen window of a small but respectable London home, landing expertly among the plates, mugs, and stacks of buttered toast. Sirius Black, looking a little unkempt in just his boxers but very pleased with himself, glanced up from his copy of the Daily Prophet and untied the note from the owl's outstretched leg. It took some toast off his plate as payment, then took off back into the hazy morning.

Sirius unpeeled the note carefully and had to take a moment to understand the scrawled, hurriedly written message. The ink had smudged on part of the message, as of it hadn't dried before it was rolled up. Eventually, he recognized the handwriting and was able to decipher the message. It said:

"PADFOOT & MOONY —  
HOLY SHIT, IT'S HAPPENED. I'M GOING TO BE A DAD.

SHE'S TWO MONTHS ALONG. KEEP YOUR FINGERS CROSSED FOR US. 

CHEERS,  
PRONGS

PS: YOU BOTH ARE THE GODFATHERS, NO EXCUSES."

Sirius sat back, absorbed the note and what it meant, and scratched his unshaven chin. A pleased, ecstatic grin broke in his face like the sunrise. He pushed aside the Prophet and stood, note still in his hand. He could have exploded with joy.

"Hey, Remus!" he yelled back into the bedroom, where his boyfriend was still sleeping. “Guess what?!"

**Author's Note:**

> \- The Hungarian Horntail and Wonder Wand are references from the podcast (maybe Slippery Slytherin, too, but I can't specifically recall).  
> \- There is no way Sirius is Harry's dad...I double-checked the time-line to ensure it.  
> \- I, too, want a magical fish tattoo.


End file.
